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Just wondering who here has come out of the closet and actually admitted your fetish to 'normal' people (yes, I use the term very loosely)
I'd be curious to know what kind of reactions you received from friends and family.
As for me, I have only admitted my fetish to my cast and crew. Suzi has known the longest. She does not have the fetish herself, but she is very open-minded about it. She feels that, if it doesn't hurt anyone, it's harmless. She doesn't treat me differently or respect me any less because of my fetish, and she understands that I have it completely under control and am not a latent serial killer. As a result, I have become good friends with Suzi. She's a really good listener and is very understanding. Notwithstanding the positive reactions that I've had from Suzi, Dean, Velvet, Kerie, Meredith, and all the rest of my cast, I still have not come out of the closet with my family and non-acting friends. I know that there's no going back, so I continue to look over my shoulder and keep this fetish a deep, dark secret from them.
What about others out there? What experiences have you had, and how do you approach the closet mentality?
Curious Yellow... er, I mean, Curious Blue
Bluestone's Silk Videos - Producer of Sexy Crime Dramas and Superheroine Films featuring HOT actresses!
Interesting topic. While most other people openly brag about their fetishes without more dire consequences than the occasional lifted eyebrow, our's hasn't hit mainstream yet. Who cares about bondage, S%M, threesomes and homosexuality these days?
I came very close to revealing myself once. I suspect that an ex girlfriend of mine found some of my art, because she started making funny comments during sex, such as: 'You strike me as the type who would cold bloodedly shoot women while they beg for mercy...' I was shocked, embarrassed and just went: 'ME?' She never admitted sniffing through my artwork and I never admitted she was dead on. Who knows? Maybe I missed a huge chance? Anyway, I got married to somebody else. My wife doesn't know and don't think it would improve our marriage if she did ... so I keep my little secret.
Yeah this is a touchy one alright. My fiance doesn't know and I probably owe her some honesty in that respect. She once made a comment about how the homosexual overtones between xena and gabrielle were overdone but a few years ago she also admitted she was bi. I bring this up because she also made certain comments about the caligula and... well I keep hoping you know? But I'm too chicken to further the conversation. My sister knows just because she lived in the same house, saw my viewing habits, certain vcr tapes that were compilations of certain scenes, some of my artwork etc. She doesn't exactly approve but she keeps quiet which I'm grateful for because I know my conservative parents would absolutely not approve. Who have I actually talked about my fetish to? Just one girl on an online game and it was completely spur of the moment. We were in the same guild and she was talking about how she was canadian and how canada was so great (mind you this is about the same time Dr. Don ran afoul of the law up there) and I started to disagree with her. I took her to be very arrogant and self important but when I started to private message her about what I was talking about she turned out to be kinda cool. No she didn't share my interests but she turned out to be surprisingly open minded. My first thoughts were "what the hell were you thinking telling this to basically a complete stranger?" and "you're done here. She'll tell everyone what you just told her and you'll be ostracized" But nothing like that happened. As far as I know our private conversation stayed just that. Yes that was easy. But I remain fearful of telling the "wrong" person and having to deal with the consequences ranging from losing that person as a friend to possible trouble with the law (overzealous reactions from law enforcement such as in Dr. Don's case) and I stay quiet.
No, like you Blue, I never came out of the closet. The explanation why is a lot more difficult to fathom. I believe that everyone has a dark side the he or she keeps hidden and don't wish to show that side of them to the worldl. I ask myself, what do I possibly have to gain by admitting to the death fetish? Nothing, I am not a famous person or a person in a high government position. There are no bodies in my closet, my ex students are none the worst for having met me. I did my job and worked very hard to guide and educate them. The death fetish never got in my way of living like a normal human being. If I come out of the closet, the only people I hurt are my immediate family. Why put them through that?
The closest I ever came to even hinting about my fetish was to my present lady friend. Even then, I only told her that I was a member of a message board, but I didn't tell her the nature of the board. Some things are better left unsaid. Must we show every wart and imperfection, if it is that, in our soul? However, I do greatly admire people who have come out of the closet, they have met some very understanding people, and have one less secret to burden themselves with.
Im pretty open with my fetish. Perhaps it is the way I communicate what I like to others. Of course I do so with people I trust in. Close friends, or just people Ive talked to for a while.
I believe the difference is on how you make the approach. If you go straight to the: "I get a boner if I think about shooting you in the tits" then you`ll probably be in troubles.
However, I chose to approach by the funny side of the fetish. The childish play with guns and reactions and a psychological explanation as to how those reactions (both verbal and physical) may turn on some guys, like me. Once they bite that "light" introduction then I can chose wether I want to let them know a little more indepth or not.
Not really....I have been a little more open with people in these forums...but my girl is the only one who reall knows me and my fetish....and that is because she likes this stuff too. Part of this is that I don't think thay many folks would understand and think I am a latent serial killer and the other is that I never really made my sexual interests anybody elses biz...
Just a few weeks back I decided to talk about it to my neighbour (who is not, never was nor will be my girlfriend, but is a very close friend in whom I confide a lot). Still, I was not completely sure how she would take it. She was in fact very understanding, told me a bit about other men she had known with even stranger fetishes, and encouraged me to get in touch with like-minded people (which is why I registered on this board). I've got to say it feels extremely good to have even one person you don't have to hide it from.
